You know how people find everything that’s round to be cute? Well, what about pigs – they’re also pretty rotund, have short, non-threatening legsies, one missing vertebrae in their necks, and tiny adorably coiled tails. Probably the only thing that’s non-cute about pigs is their lack of hair (except for the curly Mangalitsa swine, of course), but this shortcoming is made up by their charming oinking, floppy ears and the fact that they are amazingly great to make some innocent fun of. That’s right, we’re dedicating this article to the best kind of fun about the funkiest animal ever, and you are about to witness a hundred and twenty-six pig puns that are only the best.
We are pretty sure that by now you know how much we love our animal puns – not a day goes by without us thinking about these cool puns, coming up with our own wordplays, or throwing them back and forth between us in the office. It’s almost like an Animal Kingdom Appreciation party in here! And there’s a reason for that because animals indeed are the greatest creatures ever, and who could ever get enough of pigs, lemurs, horses, aye-ayes and all the funny puns associated with them? Well, definitely not us! So, hopefully, you will also enjoy our selection of these funny pig puns that are so very appropriate for the topic that we have going on here!
Right, the adorable puns, as you very well know, are just a little bit further down. So, scroll right there and check out our picks of the best puns regarding our beloved, squishy farm animals. Once you are done rooting through them, vote for the funniest puns that made you snort and guffaw or maybe even made you wish to have a pet pig of your own! After that, share these silly puns with anyone who might be needing a little pick-me-up today, as they are sure to brighten anyone’s mood.
A perfect and punny name for a pet pig is Chris P Bacon.
I read a story about pig anatomy. It was all straightforward until I found a twist in the tale.
What do you call an imaginary pig? A pig-ment of your imagination.
What do pig’s use as soap? Hogwash.
How do pigs write top-secret messages? With invisible oink!
What do you call a pig who does karate? A pork chop.
What do you get if you cross a dinosaur with a pig? Jurassic Pork.
What do you call a pig with no legs? A groundhog.
Did you hear about the pig that ran the Post Office? He was the first Porkmaster General.
The new house my pig friend made is quite stylish.
A sweet name to call a pig of a ‘Harry Potter’ lover is Hogsmeade.
How is a pig’s tail like 4 o’clock in the morning? It’s twirly.
What do you call a pig with skin problems? A wart-hog.
I entered my pig into a pig race but he pulled a ham string.
What do you call a glass of alcoholic pig’s blood? Swine.
What’s the difference between hot potato and a flying pig? One’s a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.
What does a mommy pig say to her piglets at the end of the day? Time to pig up your toys.
Why do piglets take home economics in school? To learn how to sow.
Where do pigs keep their money? In the piggy bank, of course.
When pigs live high on the hog, they run the risk of going into hock.
What do 99 percent of pigs ask for on their hamburgers? Piggles.
How can you tell you’re in a pig wine bar? Because everything’s swine.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
Why was the pig crying? Because he was boar-ed to tears.
What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus? A porky-pine.
What do you call a Spanish pig? Porque.
What do you give a sick pig? Oinkment.
A local farmer has trained his pigs to perform ballet. I’m going to see their production of swine lake.
What do you call a pig that does a lot of charity work? Philanthropig.
What did the pig say on the warm summer’s day? “I’m bacon.”
What happened when the pig pen broke? They had to use the pig pencil.
Why was the pig given a red card at the football game? For playing dirty.
Where do flying pigs go? Hogwarts, of course!
What do you call a pig that drives around recklessly? A road hog.
What is the most common Halloween outfit for a pig to dress up as? Frankenswine.
What do you get when you cross a pig and superman? The Man of Squeal.
How do pigs get to the hospital? A hambulance.
What do you call it when a beautiful woman tries to trick you into giving her a pig? A bae con.
What do you get when you pick a pig’s nose? Ham boogers.
Pigs can never be good football players because they hate playing with pigskin.
When the pig had a quarrel with his wife, he ended up having a gilt trip.
What do you call it when a pig loses its memory? Hamnesia.
What’s a pig’s favorite color? Ma-hog-any.
Why couldn’t the pig tie his shoelaces? He was too ham-fisted.
Why shouldn’t you tell a secret to a pig? It might squeal.
What do pigs learn in the army? Ham to ham combat.
What do you call a cold, angry pig? A ham-brr-grr.
According to pig etiquette, piglets are meant to be porcine and not heard.
When pigs work together, it’s known as collab-boar-ation.
When a pig takes out a loan, he becomes a boar-ower.
Why did the pig get fired? Insu-boar-dination.
What do the lady pigs say when someone leaves the toilet seat up? “Hoof-orgot to put the seat down?”
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
What’s the number one complaint pig spouses have about one another? Too stub-boar-n.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
What’s the first line of the pig bible? “In the bacon-ing…”
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
What’s a pig’s favorite holiday? Ar-boar Day.
What do you say to a procrastinating pig? Listen, bud, it’s snout or never.
I saw a pig with laryngitis. He was disgruntled.
Why do pigs make awful football players? They don’t like playing with the “pig skin.”
Why are pigs, awful basketball players? They hog the ball.
Why did the piglet yell at his sibling at the dinner table? She was hogging the food.
What kind of work do pigs do after school? Hamwork.
What do you get when you cross a pig with a centipede? Bacon and Legs.
What’s it called when a bunch of pigs competes in athletic games? The Olympigs.
What did Papa Pig shout at his kids in the car? “Stop swining! We’re nearly there.”
How does a young pig hit on someone? They invite them over to Netflix and swill.
What does an obstinate piglet always say to his mama? “Sow what?”
What do you call a pig that plays basketball? A ball hog.
Why did the pig break up with her boyfriend? Because he was a boar.
What happens when you play tug-of-war with a pug? Pulled pork!
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him? Filthy rich.
What did the little piglet want from the swine? A piggyback ride home.
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong? Mistaken bacon.
What did the pig exclaim when the wolf grabbed its tail? “That’s the end of me!”
What do pigs do on the evening of February 14th? They have a valenswines dinner.
What do you call a pig with three eyes? A piiig!
What do you call a pig who can’t mind his own business? A nosey porker!
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Pig… Pig who? Pig on someone your own size!
In the 5th month of every year, my aunt lets her pigs in the field… It’s mayham!
Why did it take the teen pig so long to get ready for school in the morning? She was very piggy when it comes to choosing what to wear!
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing? “I’m not a people porcine.”
What advice did grandpa pig have for his kids? “Don’t take anything for grunted.”
Pigs make awful basketball players because they are always hogging the ball.
The piglet yelled at his brother at the dinner table because he was always pigging out.
When pigs become good friends, they become pen pals.
There was so much crackling on the line, I thought a pig was disturbing the phone.
The famous musical that a pig loves to go to is Swiney Todd.
One of the punny pig names for a pig that loves Shakespeare is Hamlet.
A great name for a pig that brings magic into your life is Harry Porker.
A great name for a philosophical pig can be Francis Bacon.
If you want to name a smart pig, name him Cunningham.
Why don’t wild pigs go to parties? Because they’re boars.
What do you call someone who steals pigs? A ham-burglar.
If pigs learned to fly, would the price of bacon skyrocket?
What do you call a pig with a rash? Ham and eczema.
I’ve got a really bad case of pig flu. I must have had it for a weeeeeeeeeeeeek now!
What’s the one book all piglets read in grade school? A Series of Un-porcine-ite Events.
If your piglet wants to be a wizard, there’s only one alternative: Hogwarts.
What’s the one way you should never greet a male pig? “Sow, what’s up?”
What’s the super-confusing way that pigs say I love you? “I a-boar-you.”
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
Why was the pig a pathological liar? It’s a porcine-ality disorder.
What do you say to an overbearing pig? Stop porcine the issue.
How do you make a pig really happy on his birthday? Throw him a sow-prize party.
What are pigs celebrating when they celebrate their birthday? The day they were boar-n.
Did you hear about the piglets who wanted to do something special for Mother’s Day? They threw a sowprize party.
Why should you never rob a bank with a pig? They always squeal.
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree at me. It was a hambush.
Why did the pig go to the casino? To play the slop machine!
What did one pig say to the other? Let’s be pen pals.
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop? He called it “Ham Hocks”.
Why was the piglet whining. He was boared out of his brains.
What do you get when you cross a pig and a tortoise? A slow-pork.
Did you hear the horse and the pig are dating? They’re in a stable relationship.
What kind of ice cream do pigs like best? Hoggin Daz!
What do you have left after a pig eats a watermelon? Pork rinds.
Pig always have ink all over their faces because they live in a pen.
A ballet performance played only by pigs is called swine lake.
When the piglets returned from school, the mama pig asked them, “Hoofeels hungry?”
Please don’t go bacon this relationship.
The sweetest and punny name to call a pig is Mudpie.
Why should you never share a bed with a pig? They hog all the covers.
When pigs show affection to their wives, they send them hogs and kisses.